old 09

a year to forget

Ozzy

Jebediah Springfield

the dis-em-statued head of Jebediah Obadiah Zachariah 

Jedediah Springfield (aka Hans Sprungfeld)

Nurphlumber Croniflaxx

Naturally, with a speech impediment like his, he had to go into radio.

Professor Crizzle

imagining oppual and equisite abstractions

Cal Carb

monocled lead guitarist for the Dripstones

true gift

The true Christmas spirit is under wraps.

Harried

another false Christmas spirit

Hectic

false Christmas spirit

budgiebot

retired muppet

living on LuAnn Platters in Boca Raton

overgifted

thoughtful gift

There's always that hydrant helmet you've had your eye on.

restorative gift

..or perhaps a weekend in the mudbaths.

impractical gift

Bilious Bottles are big this year...

crafty gift

...or maybe a set of ceramic finger puppets.

tech gift

Just in time for Christmas: Google Goggles

Judith

Judith's rodent upbringing made her resourceful, but it didn't do her teeth much good.

distressed

King Scorpion

Liberty

bogboy

copacetician

ca-me-o-my-o

fortifications

Scullystone

When Mulder found this in Area 51, he knew the microchip in his partner's neck was bad news.

swami

Hamish Karobe

I recall he did something to a different something.

Jack Gurney

The 14th Earl of Gurney
prepares to enter the House of Lords.

Heather June Spuckler

daughter of Cletus and Brandine

Theodor Ragnar

Theodor Ragnar, Warrior Monk

Ditterbrand

When he was alive, Ditterbrand was a hermit. 

He's much more sociable now.

shroudmuffle

pocket locket

Found at seedy flea market.
Opens to reveal fingernail clippings.

Bosco Hearn

the once honorable Bosco Hearn

cryptosporidium

protozoan parasite of the gut and native of planetoid Crypton

gratitude

Happy Thanksgiving.

DIY graft

These DIY skin grafts are getting out of hand.

urchin chit

legal tender in kinder urban pockets

Uncle Martin

a.k.a. Exigius 12 1/2

Crazy Man Michael

Raven told him he'd kill his lover.
In anger, Michael stabbed the bird,
but who do you think it was?

cuckold

Sandman 3

Sandman 2

Sandman 1

leftover 6

a golden geek

leftover 5

a carouser

leftover 4

a little devil

Roberta

Roberta, adding up all the wrongs done her

CCTV Eye

I got my CCTV Eye on you.