Wednesday, April 19, 2006

The Great Decider

Enter, Mystery Guests, and sign in, please.

I am the Great Decider. I decide who is right and who is wrong. Not you. Not Congress. Me. I decide much as the Electoral College decided. Like the Supreme Court decided. Like the American people.... I am the Great Decider. I was elected to decide. It was mandated in a landslide that I do the deciding for the country. Nowhere is there a more Solomon-esque figurehead to make the hard decisions, the tough decisions. It is me. The Great Decider.

I am the Great Decider. I decide who is good and who is evil. I have studied the dispatches. I have funneled funds through the proper channels. I have lobbied my lessers and backed winners, I have earned political capital and I intend to use it. My decisions carry weight. I am greeted as a liberator wherever I go. It is I who decides what's best.

No, I am the Great Decider. I decide to promote the incompetent and remove the knowlegable. I decide which corporations will reap millions. I decide who is to be imprisoned indefinitely without trial or review, for any reason or no reason at all. I decide the scenarios that fit the situations, the logic behind the absurd, the cocksuredness of pipedreams. How can anyone doubt that it is I who is the Great Decider?

Whoever is the Great Decider, he's doing a fine job. A hell of a job.


spider jim said...

I dunno who's really the Great Decider, but that last one bears a striking resemblance to George Bush.

Al E. Yus said...

Actually, they're all three the president. Dick Cheney.
By the way, the DC in Washington DC stands for the Dick, did you know that?

spider jim said...

I thought it was for all the Darn Carbuncles, but if you say it's for The Big Dick, who am I to argue?
I've a good mind to sign off with the weird set of letters your host makes me type in every time I respond. Good day.


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