Friday, July 31, 2009

Zupbuck

A King Zup graces the head side
of each and every freshly minted simoleon.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Monday, July 27, 2009

Saturday, July 25, 2009

O, Death


I'll fix your feet til you cant walk
I'll lock your jaw til you cant talk
I'll close your eyes so you can't see
This very air, come and go with me

I'm death I come to take the soul
Leave the body and leave it cold
To draw up the flesh off of the frame
Dirt and worm both have a claim

- Ralph Stanley

Miwa

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Leonard Cohen

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack, a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in.

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

hunjob

Huns, like the Egyptians and the Mayans, practiced artificial cranial deformation. Mainly noses, but did a mean eyejob, too.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Tom Thumb

Cast by Merlin,
ingested and retched by many,
conveyed by butterfly and mouse cart,
killed by a spider.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Kindle Kop

Specialized thought police with the Ministry of Truth. His job is to make books unbooks.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Thursday, July 16, 2009

humaniform

humaniform in yak dung,
Khövsgöl, Mongolia.

God's Wife of Amun

In ancient Egypt, a sacred and honored title bestowed upon certain royal women.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Monday, July 13, 2009

cumulus prasad

Bellerophon

Atop Pegasus, he dropped a block of lead down the throat of the fire-breathing Chimera, causing a meltdown. Figuring that ought to get him into the Hall of Fame on Mount Olympus, he flew the horse to the heavens. Zeus thought the mortal nervy and dispatched a fly to sting Pegasus, causing him to buck. Bellerophon fell back to earth and Pegasus flew on to Olympus to bear Zeus's thunderbolts. Blind and maimed, Bellerophon wandered the earth, a broken man.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Corky Twizzle

Corky Twizzle, in his closet, watching The Curse of the Zombie Insomniacs on the tube.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Friday, July 10, 2009

Eldreth's legacy

Were we privvy to the particulars of fate, we might grasp Lord Eldreth's course.

Thursday, July 09, 2009

caller of shots

brooks no undermining of his authority

Mumph Exhumed

Abner Mumph's decayed corpse was exhumed today. No autopsy was performed; his 93-year-old wife just wanted to see how he was getting along.

Sunday, July 05, 2009

Kaguya

Japanese lunar orbiter now one with moon.

Named for princess found by woodsman inside glowing stalk of bamboo. Grew in his home to normal size and exceptional beauty. Gave five suitors impossible tasks. All failed. The emperor, smitten, asked for her hand. She refused him as well.

Kaguya grew increasingly sad, especially during moonlit nights. The bamboo cutter was concerned. She revealed to him her secret, that she was not of the earth, but the moon, and soon would be called back. When the emperor learned of this, he set guards around her to protect her from the moon people.

The moonies arrived, blinding the guards with light rays. They dressed her in a feathered robe and flew her back to the moon.

And so tenth century science fiction becomes twenty-first century science.

Saturday, July 04, 2009

Yankee Doodle

Thomas Ditson,
tarred and feathered for trying to buy a musket.

The Brits laughed and sang:

Yankee Doodle came to town,
For to buy a firelock,
We will tar and feather him,
And so we will John Hancock.


That was when we stole it from them
and turned the thing around.

Thursday, July 02, 2009