out with 2011

goodbye

locumgeist

caddywampus

Awry creature begat by union of British Columbian sea monster, the Cadborosaurus, and the common wampus cat.

Elsie mitt

For Christmas, I got this oven mitt

in the shape of my Aunt Elsie.

Uncle Stanley

tolerant of
and slightly bemused by
our antics

Uldin

Pre-Attila, his Huns ransacked Thrace.

starchild

strange visitor from another planet

starman

waiting in the sky

stardust

billion year old carbon

Ployer

His plan was bent.

transformation

Swenson's conversion to stalwarthyness
was something to see.

clastic caveman

It now appears our long held belief
that early man was dumber than a bag of rocks
is not true. There were, in fact, no bags.

bigger piggy

stirring up the dirt

hackles

I may appear calm, but the holidays have raised my hackles.

Oceaniac

I believe a Vanuatuvaluan, or thereabouts.

welkinist

reflecting on the space between

jack-in-the-box

Christmas gift idea #417

dingleberry

firing squad target

Stretch

laughs at his own lame jokes

Amyphisto

Marvel anti-hero who refused to be killed off

executive functionary

so few remain

clavicytheriumist

n.  player of bygone pianoforte
-Century Dictionary & Encyclopedia, 1911 ed.

Carly's doll

all they found

Duke

in the depths of an ether binge

garden loa

from Westboro Baptist courtyard

dross amasser

lifestyle or affliction?

Haatchuz

agent provocateur

grasshopper

Buster Wonklin

Pulverize him all you want,
you just can't wear him down.

grave error

no man's landfill

Hyperionian

Resident of the only moon in our solar system to rotate chaotically. So don't blame him.

Lonie Rawls

WANTED for terroristic threatening

She's Not There

Please don't bother trying to find her.

erlking

Follow him into the forest and
the erlking will do you grievous harm.

longing

man in the moon

112111

monkeybotnaut

NASA answers PETA

Baby's First Teeth

A milestone for daughter,
and mother, too!

Memnoch

banished for demanding God take
human form for compassion's sake

navigator

for Flight 191

Bonus Marcher

Marcher in the Bonus Expeditionary Force, WW1 vets united to seek the Promised but Elusive War Bonus. Without Facebook or cell phone, assembled in Portland, Oregon and proceeded eastward, until they arrived in the nation's capital, in the thousands, created the country's largest Hooverville, formed a newspaper, a library, schools.. DC Police Chief Glassford, himself a vet, found them a place to stay and even bought them building supplies. Evalyn Walsh McLean fed them sandwiches. Tourists arrived on the weekends. It was integrated; no Jim Crow. Herbert Hoover called it a “temporary disease.” J. Edgar Hoover called them communists... bums... Weeks went by. A Bonus Bill passed the House, was defeated in the Senate, still thousands remained encamped in their sorry lean-to's & shanties, next door to the White House, until... the Great American War Machine was deployed at MacArhur's command.

"MacArthur ordered his men to clear the downtown of veterans, their numbers estimated at around 8,000, and spectators who had been drawn to the scene by radio reports. At 4:30 p.m., nearly 200 mounted cavalry, sabers drawn and pennants flying, wheeled out of the Ellipse. At the head of this contingent rode their executive officer, George S. Patton, followed by five tanks and about 300 helmeted infantrymen, brandishing loaded rifles with fixed bayonets. The cavalry drove most pedestrians—curious onlookers, civil servants and members of the Bonus Army, many with wives and children—off the streets. Infantrymen wearing gas masks hurled hundreds of tear-gas grenades at the dispersing crowd. The detonated grenades set off dozens of fires: the flimsy shelters veterans had erected near the armory went up in flames. Black clouds mingled with tear gas."

The United States of America veterans were given one hour to evacuate the women and children, then surrender. Guffed Mac: “Had [the president] let it go on another week, I believe the institutions of our Government would have been severely threatened.”

to be continued?

Quotes and background from an article written for Smithsonian in 2003 by Paul Dickson & Thomas B. Allen

Staurolite

The Staurolites were a cruciform race.
They died out due to continual twinning.

stone spirit

Another attempt at matching
clay to an implied stone face.

Saint Fiacre

7th Century patron saint of herbs, taxi drivers,
and sexually transmitted diseases.

111111

Horath

bifurcated tyrant