“You kids better stay away from that old shed out innat field, now, you hear me? Hunh? You listenin’? Now, I’m not foolin’ ya. There’s all kinda bad things in there. What? Whatta ya mean, ‘What kinda things?’ What, you wanna go in there and die? That’s what’ll happen! Oh, you don’t believe me, hunh? Well, young lady, I can tell you stories… I may be eighty-nine years old, but I can tell you plenty. What? You wanna hear the stories? Oh, no you don’t! You’ll fall over an’ die from me tellin’ ya! You bet it’s true! I should know! My daddy told me not to go in that shed, and look what it did to me! Whatta ya mean I’m still here? O’ course I’m here! I couldn’t be tellin’ ya this story otherwise. What? I ain’t told no story? It’s cuz what’s in that shed’ll drain the life outta ya. It did me! You think I’m the same man I was when I went in there? No sirree. It changed me bad. Why, it was only ten years ago I went in thar, an’ I was a kid like you! Stupid and fulla questions, I was, too. Look what it didda me!
Oh, you wanna know what’s in there, eh? Well, there’s a big bee’s nest, for starters. Them bees’ll sting you ‘til we cain’t get you out. You’ll bloat up like a swole hawg. And you’ll die in there, and you’ll start ta staink, an’ we’ll hafta burn down the shed. That’s what they done’ta me! Then there’s the snakes. There’s a whole family of ‘em, and they ain’t like any other snakes, either, nossir. Years back, a family o’ moccasins an’ a family o’ rattlesnakes got together and had babies. They was called rattlemocs. If that warn’t bad enough, their offspring got together with some copperheads, and that was the worst. Now they’re mopperatasins, and if one just sees you, you’ll die. I’m not gonna warn you about the fire aints and the ticks, but the ticks in there are bigger’n houn’dawgs. One bite an’ you’ll turn inside out! Hey! Hey! Where you kids goin’! Come back here! Darn kids. Dora! DORA! Them kids are headed for the shed again!”
“You kids better stay away from that old shed out innat field, now, you hear me? Hunh? You listenin’?
ReplyDeleteNow, I’m not foolin’ ya. There’s all kinda bad things in there. What? Whatta ya mean, ‘What kinda things?’ What, you wanna go in there and die? That’s what’ll happen!
Oh, you don’t believe me, hunh? Well, young lady, I can tell you stories… I may be eighty-nine years old, but I can tell you plenty. What? You wanna hear the stories? Oh, no you don’t! You’ll fall over an’ die from me tellin’ ya! You bet it’s true! I should know! My daddy told me not to go in that shed, and look what it did to me! Whatta ya mean I’m still here? O’ course I’m here! I couldn’t be tellin’ ya this story otherwise.
What? I ain’t told no story? It’s cuz what’s in that shed’ll drain the life outta ya. It did me! You think I’m the same man I was when I went in there? No sirree. It changed me bad. Why, it was only ten years ago I went in thar, an’ I was a kid like you! Stupid and fulla questions, I was, too. Look what it didda me!
Oh, you wanna know what’s in there, eh? Well, there’s a big bee’s nest, for starters. Them bees’ll sting you ‘til we cain’t get you out. You’ll bloat up like a swole hawg. And you’ll die in there, and you’ll start ta staink, an’ we’ll hafta burn down the shed. That’s what they done’ta me!
Then there’s the snakes. There’s a whole family of ‘em, and they ain’t like any other snakes, either, nossir. Years back, a family o’ moccasins an’ a family o’ rattlesnakes got together and had babies. They was called rattlemocs. If that warn’t bad enough, their offspring got together with some copperheads, and that was the worst. Now they’re mopperatasins, and if one just sees you, you’ll die.
I’m not gonna warn you about the fire aints and the ticks, but the ticks in there are bigger’n houn’dawgs. One bite an’ you’ll turn inside out!
Hey! Hey! Where you kids goin’! Come back here!
Darn kids.
Dora! DORA!
Them kids are headed for the shed again!”
Now you've gone and done it. Earwormed me on mopperatasins.
ReplyDelete