first haint

haint the first for Halloween

second haint

second haint to Halloween

third haint

third haint to Halloween

fourth haint

fourth haint to Halloween

fifth haint

fifth haint to Halloween

sixth haint

sixth haint to Halloween

seventh haint

seventh haint to Halloween

eighth haint

eighth haint to Halloween

ninth haint

ninth haint to Halloween

tenth haint

tenth haint to Halloween

Kevin

Kevin's sense of wonder bought him another 90 days.

Attila the Hun

Attila wasn't so bad once you got to know him. But he didn't give you that much time.

Extra Added Bonus!

ATTILA'S DEATH EXERCISE:
1. Get drunk.
2. Have nosebleed.
3. Choke to death on your own blood.

Henry Clay

First Whig, War Hawk, and U.S. senator from Kentucky. Fought a duel over a dress code, then fought another after being compared to a rotten mackerel.

advice

"Sweetheart,
I've been there,
and I know.
Take it from me..."

Vanessa

One day, she just stopped coming to school.

Pallas

Goatish Titan-god of warcraft.
Doubles as raven perch.

offering

Broken terracotta offerings are found in sacred dumps outside many Greek temples. Is this one of them? No.

Joe the Plumber

He's Joe Sixpack on the weekend.

The Thing from the Medical Waste Dump

You expect horror, don't you? Sorry. This is a love monster.

Twenty years ago today, a newspaper girl took a call from a radio guy. She was a crack environmental reporter and he had stumbled upon a medical waste dump. They met at the dump amid syringes and body parts (okay, there were no body parts.) I was the guy. She was Bobbi, love of my life ever since.

The story made the front page of the paper on October 14, 1988. They chose not to run the picture of the monster, but now it can be shown.

Triddlethorpe

Triddlethorpe saw to it that every sonofabitch along the way who crossed him would pay in dollars, blood, or diminished capacity.

Tā moko

Moko displayed by Maori tribesman.

Ostrogoth

with a bad toup

Feste

With hey, ho, the wind and the rain,
For the rain it raineth every day.

ennui

The long sobs of autumn's violins
wound my heart with a monotonous languor.
-Verlaine

Joel

His haberdasher had his doubts, but Joel was proud of his new skullcap.

Morgue Arrival K

Subject scraped off the wall of an economic think tank. Cause of death: cranial implosion.

Zygor

seize haul nose hall

geishatart

A small pie in the shape of a Japanese hostess.
It is usually filled with coconut and raisins.

Dorian Blue

personified Doric capital, Akragas (Agrigento)

Belshazzar

Old King Belshazzar was the merry son of Nebuchadnezzer and he called for more wine. "Barkeep!' he spewled, "Set 'em up in those goblets Daddy plundered from the temple of the Jews! Let's drink to wood and stone! Then we'll drink to brass and iron! Then let's drink to silver and gold!" He also called for his fiddlers three, but before the music could play, writing appeared on the walled street.

"What's this?" he demanded to be told. "'Many, many tickle a parson?'"

No Babylonian could make heads or tails of it.

Daniel stepped up and said "No sir. Mene, mene tekel u-pharsin. Mene mene is money money. Tekel's a shekel; a coin and a weight. Upharsin's a half a mene. Numbered. Weighed. Divided. Your value has been weighed and your stock's dropped."

"Say what?"

""Your days are numbered."

"Oh, crap," whined Belshazzar, in Babylonian, of course.

"Not only that," continued Daniel, "but your menes are being absorbed by the Medes and your upharsin's are being taken over by the Persians. You're due for a bailout."

But Babylon didn't go in for that socialist stuff. Belshazzar was clobbered with a candlestick and Babylon went belly up.

Joe Sixpack

watches the VP debate

Shroud of Pain

Black op accouterment available in five lovely colors.