Higgs boson

Imagining the Higgs boson will give you a headache. You see, particles once had no mass. Then, the universe began and they did. In the nanosecond between was and is hides the boson of Dr, Higgs, theoretical physicist. Looks something like this guy here.

So now you've got your Large Hadron Collider at CERN, and two questions arise: Where's CERN, and why are all its letters capitalized? It's too complicated to explain, but while pondering, another question arises: What's a Hadron? Clearly, too many questions arise.

All you really have to know is that somewhere beneath France and Switzerland, particles, or something resembling particles, are whipping around inside two big, cold magnetic circles. When they get up to speed, a switch will be thrown, the tracks will cross and boom! Particles will collide. The boson will be observed, possibly laughing, but only for a split second. After which, either a black hole sucks us all in, OR (as scientists hope) an alternate universe is formed, one where science finds an answer to the question of life, the universe, and everything. If only we could teach it in the schools.