Alf Zedman

the one who cares

or at least earnestly looks like he does.

Papa

He wasn't around much, so I
don't have a clear picture of him.

glossolalien

speaks in tungsten

foot picker

He used to pick his feet in Poughkeepsie.

Lufe b'Gowl

Nolster

Seussian known to noodle on the one-nozzled noozer.

Sir Melamine

The esteemed Metabolite of Cyromazine.

Tenny Cripps

convolution

no spoke

You can pick your nose

or you can poke your friends, but…

what the hell - 

you can poke your nose, too.

dark girl

Olde Anglo

Myrmidon

Another of Zeus’s rascally escapades was when he presto’d Eurymedousa into an ant and then proceeded to rape her. Thus begat Myrmidon, who was followed by an entire race of soldiers who blindly obeyed any order given them.

knave

sketchy character

Old Thrashbarg

Lamuellan priest who bows before the ineffable will of Almighty Bob.

p.s.e.i.

possible side effects include..

Obu Tanaka

So, you stumble. The next thing you know, you’re in mid-air, tumbling end over end. Apparently, you’ve gone over a cliff. What bum luck. But wait. You reach into your pocket and pull out your carved effigy of Obu Tanaka, protector of children, the insane, insane children, and cliff strollers. You gather your wits and summon the words to the incantation. “Mahominy frobish, spoorfit Tanaka.” And, wonder of wonders, you’re falling no more. Because you’ve hit bottom.

By the way, the correct wording is “Mahominy frobish, spaarfit Tanaka.”

wallop packer

There's upwards of a hundred per bushel.

Gwareet Flambeau

Gwareet Flambeau, dream intruder.

Rousseau

charyscoff

Mayor of Mirador

Tyronius

No need to worry. 

Tyronius will take care of everything.

abstig strucemata

protometatherian

child with beast friend

bramblebound

Freda May Sims,

my first crush

Saint Drogo

Patron saint of the repulsive and baristas.

Your mother dies when you are born. Are you a murderer? Drogo thought he might be, so went on the road with The Penitents. They hit every holy dive between Sebourg and Rome. Developed the ability to be at two gigs at once. Drogo caught some cooties and returned home in an ugly state. I mean ugly. The townfolk, repulsed, stuck him in a cage out back where he passed on to sainthood. Had a posthumous hit with “The Vile and Loathsome Blues.”